Now that it’s come to light that former Vice President Mike Pence’s lawyers have discovered classified documents in his Indiana home, I’m sensing that most Americans are considering what is surely to be dubbed “document gate,” to be a political clown show unworthy of their attention and are tuning it out (if they ever tuned in). But there are a couple of leadership lessons here that are well worth exploring.
We’ll start by admitting that leaders are human beings who make mistakes. And lately, we’ve seen a raft of them, including…
- Southwest Airlines’ leadership failing to modernize its aging pilot scheduling system resulting in the worst systematic meltdown in its often celebrated history.
- Google wrongly assuming it’s record growth of 2021 would continue resulting in having to lay off over 6% of its workforce.
- Elon Musk believing that Twitter was just a simple technology company that could be fixed but resulting in chaos instead, now being referred to in the media as the “Twitter s**tshow”
Frank Wilczek, the American physicist and Nobel Laureate, once said, “If you don’t make mistakes, you’re not working on hard enough problems. And that’s a big mistake.”
So, to be generous, let’s assume that in many cases, business leadership mistakes are not deliberate, but rather the result of people at the top screwing up while trying to solve hard problems. Fair enough, that’s what they get paid the big bucks for.
But when these mistakes seriously impact the lives of employees and customers – which is certainly true in regard to the Southwest debacle and Google layoffs (some employees only found out they’d been laid off when their badges stopped working!) – leaders need to own them and apologize.
Earlier this month, Bob Jordan, CEO of Southwest, took a stab at this with an apology to the airline’s customers, many of whom had slept overnight in closed airports and/or are still missing their lost luggage, writing, “I know that no amount of apologies can undo your experience.” He went on to award each impacted passenger 25,000 frequent flyer points (worth $300).
Years of studying both successful business apologies (here are a few examples) and failed – no, truly awful – apologies (here are 5) has led us to the conclusion that genuinely apologizing for mistakes is a critical factor in whether or not an employee or customer considers you to be a Respectful Leader.
Here are the components of what we call a “Full Apology,”
1. Admit It: admit, specifically, what you did/said.
2. Describe How It Hurt Them: so that they know that you know how they were hurt.
3. Make No Excuses: If you say “I’m sorry, but…” or “I did it because…” then you’re preparing to make an excuse. Don’t. Instead, simply say “there are no excuses.”
4. Apologize Sincerely and Ask for Forgiveness: by asking for forgiveness, you’re giving the person you hurt the power to forgive you, or not. Relinquishing power is a key component of a successful apology.
5. Promise, Never Again: this is tough for many people. But if you don’t make this promise, you’re leaving open the possibility that you will do it again, thus rendering your apology suspect.
6. Offer to Make Amends: just as Southwest did with its passengers, you’ll need to find a way to make amends in some meaningful way.
7. Start Making Amends: regardless of whether your apology has been accepted and/or you’ve been forgiven, you need to start making amends right away.
At CRL, our research indicates that Full Apologies can make a significant difference going forward in business relationships. For example…
– You’re more likely to be respected if you offer a Full Apology rather than make excuses or ignore your mistakes.
– The “trust gap” between you and the person you hurt will be tightened up.
– People will see you as “human,” and will be more likely to cut you some slack going forward.
– You will feel better about yourself and your own integrity.
So, the next time you make a leadership mistake, like failing to turn in classified documents at the end of your term, you’ll be doing yourself a favor by making a Full Apology. If you need help, let us know at hello@respectfulleadership.org
