Sympathy Versus Empathy and Why You Should Know the Difference
When one of my clients experienced discrimination in the workplace, she confided in a colleague. She had hoped to feel understood, validated, and supported. Instead, her colleague’s response made her feel dismissed and belittled. She was a high performer at her company, but she had recently been denied a leadership position. “You’re Asian,” her boss had said....
Open Our Hearts
Although I’m having trouble finding out more about someone named Janice Maeditere, they’re quoted in many places on the web as having said something about Christmas that I find particularly profound… “Christmas is not as much about opening our presents as it is opening our hearts.” On December 8th, the Center for Respectful Leadership held its CEO Summit and CEO’s Give Back Bash in San Diego...
The War on Children
For this week’s newsletter, I was going to craft a take-down of the so-called, made-up, non-existent “war on Christmas” (did you know that it was originally ginned up by the John Birch Society in 1959?) but decided it was much more important to talk about another – all too real – war instead: Putin’s illegal and unwarranted invasion of Ukraine. The horrors of this war are numerous: constant...
Build Your Business with Internal Leadership Development
For any manager, it’s a real shame to lose good people on your team. Employee turnover is also very expensive. Most companies invest thousands of dollars in hiring and training, not to mention loss of productivity during each transition. Yet, more than a third of employers are expecting to lose employees to competitors this year due to dissatisfaction over salary and advancement opportunities,...
The Neuroscience of Respect
Imagine you’re in an important business meeting with your boss and colleagues, and you’re in the middle of making a crucial point. Suddenly your boss interrupts you, dismisses your idea, and takes over the conversation. Odds are you’d be annoyed to say the least; your heart rate may increase; your face might flush, and you may feel the need to move your limbs, to do something physical like...
Antisemitism on the Rise
I must admit, until Ye – the musician and designer formerly known as Kanye West – tweeted that he would “go death con 3 on Jewish people,” I wasn’t paying as much attention to the rise of antisemitism in this country as I should have. Shame on me. Quick research shows that according to the Anti-Defamation League, which tracks antisemitic behavior in the US, there was a 37% rise in...
How Coaches Can Help Their Clients Admit Biases About Co-Workers
Recently I was talking with another executive coach who asked me, “How do you get your clients to admit their biases about their co-workers?” That’s a good question. My first response was “very carefully.” When we’re calm, cool and not under threat, most of us will admit that we hold some negative biases about others. But usually, these are what I call “acceptable biases,” the ones most people...
The Four Yeses: Creating mutually respectful relationships through trust & care
Relationships are at the heart of everything, even (or especially) in business. But good relationships take work to build and develop. And unless you have put in that work, you can’t assume your colleagues and employees will automatically trust and respect you. Your relationships function better when you’ve invested some relational capital. Imagine how different Luke Skywalker’s response to...
3 Strategies for Giving & Receiving Feedback
An overwhelming number of human resource professionals find that giving critical feedback is one of the most challenging conversations they routinely have. Maya Hu-Chan, one of CRL’s esteemed advisors, has also found this to be the case. However, she takes that conversation a step further and examines not only giving, but also receiving critical feedback. If you are reading this article you...